


The Wedding Of Mr and Mr Bond

by LivetoDream333 (orphan_account)



Series: Double-O Drabbles [47]
Category: James Bond (Craig movies)
Genre: Almost Cold feet, From James, I had fun, I love Alec in this one., M/M, Q's right as wine, Vows, Wedding Fluff, but can't tie his bowtie, i'm going to stop tagging now, it's cute, jitters, prompt
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-03-07
Updated: 2015-03-12
Packaged: 2018-03-16 17:36:29
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 3,510
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3496946
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/LivetoDream333
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>prompt: in one of your stories James and Q are married so... We all want to know about that special day. Where Alec is best man and reading funny jokes about James because that's tradition. It's a daylight wedding like a proper English wedding must be done. Everyone from MI6 are invited. No drunken James or Q because both want to remember that day. Specially James since his whole life and most of his time, he is pretending to be someone he is not. Could you also please, please try to write a two-chapter drabble?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. If I Stay

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Cone_23](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Cone_23/gifts).



> Got around to it, but I'm going to be busy...the next chapter may take a while. I'm on holiday and writing isn't often easy. I'll get to it if I can, if not I'll see you April.

If I Stay

 

It was the perfect day, in fact, it was one of the only days it hadn’t rained in the past month. The sun was shining, flowers were blooming, white rows of chairs had been set up and white flowers adorned the end of each one. It was perfect and small and beautiful. Simple, beautiful, and deadly—as were the two men it was for. Deadly in that nearly everything was secretly weaponized…just in case.

James Bond looked down at it from his room shaking before he started to pace.

The door opened without a knock. “Hey, I—oh…you’re already dressed and having a panic attack. I suppose I don’t have to kick your as then.” Alec hopped onto the bed and crossed his ankles in front of him. James was dressed in a flawless suit, his bow tie undone and hanging around his neck. “So…what sort of therapy session do I have to provide?”

“I can’t do this.” James whispered. Alec sighed heavily.

“What is it, James? Because leaving that man at the alter after _you_ proposed would be a dumbass thing to do.”

“You don’t understand.”

“Then tell me so I can.”

“If I stay I know what happens. I’m happy, he’s happy. I work. He works. He lives and breathes to bring me home and I keep going out, living and breathing for danger. One of two things will happen: I could die in the field or I could survive it—most likely not unscathed. If I die in the field Q won’t take it. He would have killed himself by starvation had I not been around when 009 died and that was just 009…let’s face it I’m obviously his favorite.”

“Given.”

“If I don’t di It’ll be worse… I’ll probably come out injured and grow bitter and awful and just…all this badness inside will come out of me and I can’t let Q deal with something that even I don’t want to deal with. It can only end in pain.”

“So leave, walk away.” Alec said simply. “But before you go and open that door tell me what it would do. What would you leaving do?”

James didn’t even have to think.

“It would destroy him…and kill me.”

“So really…let’s think about this James… Say you leave him, you’d drive yourself mad with regret and probably get yourself killed on a mission and he’d stew in what he might have done wrong, maybe even start forgetting to eat and we all know how quickly that spirals out of control. If you stay and you die…well that _would_ destroy him, and sorry mate I don’t think I can be there for him after you’ve gone—I haven’t seen anyone so co-dependent since I watched those Winchester brothers. Most likely…though…you’re going to get shot in the knee or the shoulder and they won’t be able to put you back together. All of that adrenalin you crave all of the adventure that keeps you from going insane is going to end and you may just grow hateful and bitter—you may even become a complete bastard, or maybe like that cranky old man who yells at everyone…”

“If you’re trying to make me feel better you’re doing a great job.”

“But don’t you love Q at all?” It was a slap to the face. “Weren’t you just talking about how he makes you feel happy even with the stupid mundane things in life just yesterday? Can’t you sacrifice a little fucking bit for him? Can’t you realize that nothing is perfect? Can you realize that marriages that don’t end in divorce end in death? It’s normal, James. Sure, you two are a bit different from normal, but it still applies James. You love him, he loves you and even when you’re old and bitter and tired he’ll look after you and make you feel alive. You aren’t necessarily the sweetest guy to begin with James and he loves you—that man adores you. Don’t ignore that or devalue it. I know it’s normal to have jitters but…still. James he can handle you now, I’m sure he can handle anything…and if he makes you so happy, happy enough you’ve considered retiring why in the hell do you think he’d ever allow you to turn into more of a grumpy old man than you already are?”

“I don’t know whether to punch you or not.” James said with a smile.

“Technically I just saved your marriage, so I’m betting on the not.” Alec commented. “Would you have really just left?”

“I don’t think I would have had the strength…but still…it was tempting… I just want him to be happy, he deserves it.”

“He is happy, keep him that way or all of MI6 will be on your ass.” James chuckled and Alec grinned. “Here, let me help you with that.” He reached for James’ bowtie.

“I can bloody well do it myself.”

“It’s tradition.”

“What’s tradition?”

“I was told that usually the best men spend all night before a wedding on Youtube learning how to tie a bowtie so that the grooms don’t have to.” Alec said, buttoning the top button before tying the tie.

“Really?”

“Apparently this is an archaic thing. It seems everyone just uses the snap on ones these days.”

“Idiots.”

“Yes…well…Bill had to help Q with his.”

“He’s my idiot…” James shrugged.

“Does he really not know how to tie a tie?”

“Tie? Yes. Bowtie? Probably not. Every time he’s needed one I do it for him…or take everything off far too fast for him to even get to the point where he’d attempt to tie a bowtie.”

“Sounds like a good time.”

“The best.” James smirked.

“Come on. The people are gathering around.” Alec commented after he’d pinned a perfectly perfect flower on James’ lapel. “You’ll do fine. You picked a good one.”

800Q8

It was simple and without fanfare. Neither Q nor James had parents, so they both walked with their best men down the aisle, James meeting Q at the alter. Eve catcalled, R was nearly in tears. The audience was small but among the most powerful bunch in the world. All of the minions had managed to slip into their seats, most of the double-os made it, M, Eve, and a few stray members of MI6 managed to slip into the seats. The only four people who weren’t MI6 (aside from a few plus ones) were the landlady at Q and James’ shared flat (who honestly put up with too much noise sometimes, but she was wonderful to both of them, almost like a mother), the young woman Q had once been neighbors with who had become something of a little sister to him, the reverend, and the waiter at the restaurant James and Q had met at once.

That waiter didn’t know his workplace was the place where Q was merely giving equipment for the field to James. He didn’t know that the two of them had never dated before…but he’d watched as Q had ordered something, James hadn’t, and watched as the two of them tried to out-snark each other. His exact words were—perhaps—a bit too blunt but very honest: “Please don’t shag on the table, go somewhere else if you’re going to do that, and if you aren’t shagging please do so so the rest of world could have some peace.”

Q had nearly choked to death and James was actually frazzled a bit.

They went back on their anniversary. Jason was still a waiter and had remembered them, smiling at them as they had held hands over the table. He unknowingly brought them together and became something as close to a friend as one could have outside of MI6.

The vows were simple and their own.

“James Bond, I can’t promise much, because the future never really is a clear thing, but I can promise you that I will be honest with you, I will always protect and fight to my last breath for you, I will always look for you even when you don’t think you want to be found, I will always bring you home, I will always be here when you get back, I will be at your side through anything, and I will always, always love you, even after I’m gone.”

“Sebastian Parker,” there were a few shocked looks in the crowd from those who had never heard their Quartermaster’s name before, “I’ll always want to come home.” James smiled and Q beamed back. “I will love you and protect you and do anything and everything in my power to keep you happy and safe, I’ll be there for you on the days you aren’t happy, and I’ll learn how to make a good cuppa,” everyone who had ever made Q a cup of tea laughed nervously. Q never liked anyone else’s tea. “And I will always love you, Seb…”

“Now wait…” Alec commented. “I’m confused. Is this the part where the groom kisses the groom or the _groom_ kisses the _groom_?” Alec asked teasingly, gesturing to both of them strangely. Q and James laughed, but the reverend seemed completely confused, as if the question had him confused as well. James didn’t wait before pulling Q in close and pressing a kiss to his lips. Q smiled happily and kissed him back. Eve was crying. R was crying. Tanner and Alec catcalled. No one was bombing them.

The world was perfect.

 


	2. Speeches

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I strayed a little from the prompt...no funny stories...but I thought that this was more accurate.  
> :D

Speeches

 

Alec downed his glass of champagne poured another and then deemed it alright to stand up, clearing his throat. The chatter quieted and Tanner stood up next to him. They were each sitting on opposite sides of James and Q, Alec next to Q, Tanner next to James. “Well, normally the best man—uh, men—stand up and joke about their friends and make everyone laugh at their stupidity…but honestly James’ laundry’s pretty much out there for everyone to see who has half-decent clearance or knows Moneypants talks a bit when tipsy, so by now all the secrets have been told.” Eve flipped Alec off. “Love you too, dear.” Alec winked. “And well, out dear Q keeps his life close to his chest, so I don’t know of a way to make a mockery of him.”

“So, we decided to talk about something that not many people got to see. The James in the 007 and the Sebastian in the Quartermaster.” Tanner smiled.

“When MI6 went to hell I was in Dubai in deep cover…James was the first to meet our young, untested Quartermaster. I was the last to meet him of our fellows. I never go straight to Six as everyone knows, so the first time I heard about Q I heard about him through James. First I was told there _was_ a new Q and M and that many of our colleges had died while I was gone, but second James spoke about Q. Something about his words struck an odd spot in me. James described Q as: a kid who is brilliant and knows it, looks like a child but isn’t, and someone I should trust. The trust part struck me. James, 007, Bond, James Bond, Sterling… However you know this man, he doesn’t trust and he doesn’t trust anyone within just one mission with them. I knew then Q was someone special and James did too.”

“Q met James and did something stupid right from the off. He stood up to him, held his own, and then did what the crazy man asked of him.” Tanner started. “It wasn’t a typical first meeting. Most who meet James, especially when he isn’t in the best mood want to punch him and usually when Q gets demeaned by someone he punches them or stabs them with a paralytic pen and leaves them for hours to think about what they did to piss him off.” Alec chuckled and rubbed his arm, he’d been a victim. “Q actually liked him. I remember him telling me that James wasn’t as bad as everyone said, they just couldn’t realize that James and 007 were different.”

“They said I was bad?” James asked Q, leaning over to whisper in Q’s ear.

“Uh, yeah. They told me to bring a gun with me.”

“Lovely, I like that they’re afraid.”

“You would.” Q chuckled.

“Q was the only person who wasn’t afraid of James or afraid to snap at him or tell him what’s what.” Tanner smiled.

“And James, he liked that.” Alec smiled. “It was an easy friendship between the two of them. They both bickered with each other, sassed each other, joked, worked well together, and trusted each other. It worked for them, but I was privileged enough to see more than most did. Yes, we all got to experience the countless flirting episodes over the comms, but James really flirts with everyone, especially on missions, so that didn’t count… No, I got to see him really fall for Q. It happened all at once and it’s probably the most shocking thing I’ve ever seen. At the time James and I were sharing a flat because his was sold by the bitch.”

Eve nearly choked on her drink. Q and James smiled slightly.

“Alright? Good. Anyway, James had come home from Uganda his gun left behind in pieces and they wouldn’t allow him one. It wasn’t a good mission, not at all. He was nervous and twitchy and frightened of his own shadow and he wasn’t allowed to keep a gun on him. Yes, it’s protocol so…we didn’t have one at our own flat, because Six had taken them back. No one was supposed to give him one under punishment of possible castration or death, whichever happened first. It was raining, and I mean _pouring,_ and at midnight someone knocked on the door. James wasn’t asleep but he wouldn’t go to the door. So I did. Q walked into our flat and put his hand on the back of James’ neck. First I was shocked that Q wasn’t dead in an instant, but Q didn’t seem surprised. ‘Come on, Bond. I’ve got you.’ He led James to the corner of the room, grabbed a pillow and a blanket and told James to lay in the corner. Surprisingly, he listened and Q covered him up and sat next to his head. Then I heard Q in his best Quartermaster voice: ‘I’ve got eyes outside, the wall behind you could last a grenade and is too thick for bullets, entrance is only possible from one direction and I can see them before they can see us.’ Q pulled a gun from under his arm, loaded it, and looked at the door, before he told James to go to sleep.”

“There were no words to describe the look on James’ face.” Alec shook his head. “I’ve known him longer than anyone. I’ve never seen him look so shocked, so grateful, so completely at peace. Those eyes most people can’t look into, softened and something in them made it quite clear, instantly, that he’d fallen in love with our resident genius. He fell asleep within a few minutes, but after that moment he never looked at Q the same, never. Of course, Q would have done that for any one of his agents, but that didn’t matter to James, because I don’t think anyone’s ever done that for him… I don’t think anyone else could have made him feel that safe.”

“Q fell by inches.” Tanner said. “And those who knew him, for the most part, didn’t notice, but I’m his best man so I know a thing or two. Q, naturally, has a sort of affection for all of his agents. Some he sees as unruly children, *cough* Alec *cough* but he does all have a tie to all of them, either as friends or as a protector. James and Q always had an easy friendship, it was easy to see. But things started changing. I noticed it first in the flirting. Over the headset or even in person James would flirt at Q and Q would either say something witty or flirt back, completely dry and deadpan. But then his eyes started shining whenever the flirting started and he seemed to genuinely enjoy it, rather than indulge it. It was the first of many, tiny, cracks in Q’s perfect and constant control. Little smiles when James walked by. He called him more by Bond and less by 007. Everyone knows that once you name something you start getting attached to it.”

“When we lost 001 no one watched Q, because they all knew not to bother him, knew he’d be upset, but I—admittedly—followed him.” Tanner continued. “I needed to make sure he was safe and that he got home and didn’t get too drunk. He didn’t go home. He went to James’ flat.” James looked at Q, confused. “He went to knock, but then looked down, turned around and got into my car. He knew I’d followed him, but his first instinct when he was hurting was to go to James. I knew something was changing.”

“Then—of course—just as they both start realizing that they have these…stirrings, our good friend Jason outed both of them.” Alec chuckled. “When I said I saw these two for who they were…really, I meant to say I saw all of them. I’m not proud, but I have to admit I was happy to see the sexual tension end…though really Bill, if you and M ever get to it, don’t do it in front of me.” It obviously wasn’t a planned side-note, both Tanner and M turned bright red. “Okay…and they’ve been outed… Anyway…after Jason made his comment the two of them promptly came back to _our_ ,” Alec gestured to himself and James, “flat and well…got that tension out.” Q had the decency to blush, James kissed him on the cheek. “I had to sneak out, easier said than done.” Everyone chuckled. “Bill and I got a special insight on these two because of how close of friends we were to each of them and we were privileged to see into their lives.”

“Believe it or not, James makes a decent housewife.” Tanner commented, finally regaining his feet. “Surprisingly, he’s usually home more often than Q is, because he gets mandatory leave and Q hacks into everything and erases his leave because he’s a controlling ass who doesn’t know when to say no to work. I’ve been invited over for card games and…if you could see how sweet it is…you’d understand just how perfect these two are. One Friday James had managed to cook a meal and clean up, but Q didn’t show up when he should have. Alec, Eve, and I were playing poker, but James left and picked up Q, brought him home made sure he ate and got him into bed before sending us home so Q could sleep in peace.”

“They take care of each other, mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually.” Alec said with a nod. “When James bleeds, Q stitches him. When Q bleeds, James kills whatever hurt him…and then stitches him up (or vis-versa, whatever takes priority at the time). When James can’t take his job—his life anymore, Q takes ahold of him and carries him through. When Q doesn’t eat or sleep, James makes him. When a mission goes south, they take care of each other.”

“We know about the office betting pool.” Tanner commented. “But you won’t win, none of you. They aren’t going to fuck in Q’s office or in MI6, they aren’t like that.”

“I can admit to knowing about some very desperate and needy sex, but never until they get home. Honestly, did it always have to be while I was still home? Couldn’t you wait ten seconds?” Alec demanded.

“They’re sweet. James isn’t 007 with Q. He isn’t all gun and hatred and ice and pain and anger and killer and blood. With Q, he’s James. He’s warm and loving and kind and fierce and protective and compassionate and loves kiss, handholding, lazy Sunday cuddles and hugs more than the sleeping around everyone thinks he takes part in.” Tanner smiled.

“Sebastian isn’t Q with James. He isn’t all fire and sass and stiffness and calm and control and intellect. With James he’s gentle and tender and warm and sweet. He’s got his hair fluffed and he wears James’ clothes rather than his awful cardigans…”

“I suppose that all we can say is that they’re blessed that they found one another and we’re blessed that we got to see it, even if some of us saw a bit too much at times. Congratulations you two and may death part you only long after you’ve both retired.”

“Amen, Bill.” Alec smiled, raising his glass.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much love.

**Author's Note:**

> Much Love.


End file.
